Sunday, July 09, 2006
[Shitty Days]
[Shitty Days]
Sigh.
I feel shitty.
Seriously shitty.
I thought my life would take in a different direction after the holidays when I resolve to be a better daughter to my parents.
It seems I might not be going anywhere after all.
Why is it that an expectation always look realistic until you set your heart to do it? It seems that setting your heart to do something would make the difficulty of it double and triple.
No Cs or Ds for exams. That sounds achievable. Until you say, "I'm the one to get all As and Bs."
Boom! Obstacle course.
Work hard. Work hard. Work hard.
I feel like slapping myself in the face man... work hard.
I can't stand it.
Everytime I confide in people about these academic woes I get standard replies.
"You really have to work hard."
"You must put in effort!"
"All things will turn out right as long as you perservere!"
"We're all going through the same shit lah..."
"Everybody's stressed."
"You need to practice."
"You have to finish your studies first, then you can move on to other things you like!"
Can I hear something less common?
Something more inspiring?
I am sick and tired and hungry and bored and downtrodden.
I want something new and good to happen.
Like... I don't know. Some millionaire is willing to pull me out of the education system and send me to a drama school for full time drama training. Or maybe someone to take me out of Singapore and fly me to some faraway land.
Or something that can make me grow up faster so that I can start my repertory theatre troupe ASAP...
Or marry somebody who can take me on a trip around the world... over sideways and under...
Like who will take me in the first place lor!
Stop dreaming, idiot.
Life is short you stupid whore.
[fangying] [10:55 PM]
