Sunday, March 12, 2006
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It's the last day of the production, "Ali Baba and the 21 Thieves".
I'm so glad it's over; at the same time, I feel sad that it had to be over.
It feels so great to heave a sigh of relief and officially say, "My weekends are free"; yet, when I look at the empty schedule for weekends I can't help but wonder what would I be doing then.
It's one worry gone; it's one dream pursued; it's one dream come true.
I thought, after the xie mu I will cry. But I didn't... I was too happy to have any tears left in me. I'm so contented I really can't cry. It's sad, yes, but when you know you've done your best to fulfil your responsibility, even if it's a small one, you would undoubtedly get a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. And that feeling comes even stronger when family and friends gave you feedback and said, "That was spetacular! Wonderful! Fantastic! Simply marvellous!" and tell you that you did great. Sure, all that practicing and rehearsing made me so drained of energy every weekend and took up so much of the time you could use to do homework, study more thoroughly for tests, tend to my Sims and spend time with your family and friends, but when the curtain falls, for the last time, in front of you, when you hear the applause and the cheering, when your co-actors start running up to you and hugging you, saying, "We did it!", you'll forget all the hardship. It's worth failing an A Maths test; it's worth neglecting your Sim who's in mid-term pregnancy; it's worth owing three sub-chapters' worth of E Maths homework.
When you're pursuing your dream, all those trivial things don't matter anymore.
These few days in the theatre together, I got to know Esther, Sheryl and Kimberly (aka Siew Ying, Shi Xuan and Wan Lin, aka "Halima, Ayida and Amina")so much better. Spending so many hours together in the same dressing room, talking, joking, laughing, crying, quarreling, crapping, going crazy and signing each other's autograph books, you can't help but realise that friends can be made anywhere in this world. It didn't matter that they're two or three years younger than me, age is no barrier. Strangely, when people of different ages communicate with each other, the younger becomes more mature while the older becomes more youthful.
I also talked, for the first time, to so many other people whom I never had the chance, or rather, the initiative, to talk to, especially the frogs and the thieves. Evewn if it was just a few words, it's still words. And who knows, we might never get to know each other well enough to talk to each other in a long and peaceful conversation.
Even though I had never been to Kallang Theatre to perform for all my life until these few days with the Ali Baba Cast and Production Team, I can't help but feel a sense of familiarity, especially when I'm on stage. It just felt like going to an old home you hadn't visited in a very long time... that feeling that you've been away from, and brought back to, a place you deeply love. When I stand there, on the Kallang stage, I just felt like crying out, "This is where I belong.". And now, after the production, I'm beginning to miss it terribly.
It was just like my experience at Victoria Theatre; I never forgot the corridors, the dressing room with two rows of wardrobe and dressing tables, the spiral staircase that led to the basement with black walls where we had our lunch or dinner, the stage that was smaller than Kallang's, the velvet cushioned seats, the wings, the curtains and so much more. Whenever I go there to watch a show after Witchtopia, I always wished I could go backstage and relive all those memories, replaying those fun times we had playing Truth or Dare at the corridor. I know I will remember Kallang the same way I had remembered Victoria.
Standing at the wing, waiting for my turn to make an impact in the audience's memories, I figured, This is how I want to live my life. And every minute I spend on stage, being Malika the evil sis-in-law, made this point clearer, This is how I want to live my life.
[fangying] [8:53 PM]
